Band Is
by xomusic4lifexo
Summary: Ok long story short: this is just a bunch of random stuff from the DJH band and what band is to us. Written by Me and two of my friends. R&R!


Hey guys!! Yeah so I'm going to start writing in the marching band department as well, starting with this. My friends Melanie, Amanda, and I wrote this. I wrote most of this 'cept for the indicated ones and Melanie made a few comments on some. Oh Melanie and I are working on this marching band fanfic based on our lives at school so expect to see that sometime soon. Enjoy! Oh and we dedicate a good fraction of this to our awesome band teacher: Scott Condne (mostly cuz a lot of this is about him lol).

Do I really need a disclaimer?

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Band is… 

- being able to be late to band w/o getting in trouble

- 75 of the band has your director's cell number

- calling your director on the Cedar Point trip just to bug the crap out of him

- over-competitive flutes (MEL: way over-competitive)

- family away from your family

- watching high school musical a bajillion times during the free week after festival

- your director spending $100 on pizza and pop for the whole band for getting straight 1s at festival

- getting straight 1s at festival and acting like spazzes because you're excited

- getting up at 6am for your 8:30am Solo & Ensemble performance (MEL: 8:24am, in my case)

- being pulled from class just to get ready for pep assemblies

- getting up at 8am to get ready for you 3pm festival performance (on a Saturday)

- being able to call your director your friend instead of your teacher

- your director acting like he's a rock star

- said director thinking he's still 15 when he's really 35

- going in to band on the first day, seeing your director's new blonde highlights on his black-ish hair and saying "what the heck did you do to your hair?!"

- trumpets thinking they're the best (MEL: LIES:)

- said trumpets thinking they rule the world (MEL: they wish)

- flute choirs

- one word: vuderschnicle!

- having your director buy pizza for the 9 band people who played in full orchestra

- eating said pizza till 5 on Friday just hanging out with your director

- taunting your director because he's never had a taco in his life (MEL: which is okay, since in my opinion, they're pretty nasty anyways)

- no homework

- no tests

- no stupid exams

- festival in general

- Solo & Ensemble

- Cedar Point trips (MEL: Joe and Taylor…grr…) (MIA: just so's you all know, Joe is Mel's boyfriend)

- annoying-as-heck percussionists

- watching West Side Story with a sub that looks like a monkey and smells like a fish

- having an OCD director

- having to clean the music tech lab for no apparent reason other than your director told you to (MEL: and because he's OCD)

- finding harmful bacteria in the band room sink (MIA: ewww!)

- eating lunch in the tuba lockers

- going in the tuba lockers, coming out, and pretending you've entered another dimension

- doing the cancan in the band locker room

- playing "HUH!" really obnoxiously just to annoy your director

- singing the Christmas song your director wrote at the top of your lungs in band

- and geometry class

- and the hallway

- while people give you crazy looks

- playing the cd you, the other 15 people in music tech, and your director made in the music tech class

- did I mention it's a Christmas cd??

- and you still play it in June just to hear your song

- making up stupid insiders at sectionals

- checking out your director's myspace, website, and livejournal

- many times

- being grossed out that your director's girlfriend is 22

- while he's 35

- you do the math

- skipping school to go to marching band rehearsal for homecoming

- insulting you band director to his face

- then he insults you back

- plotting against a fellow flutist w/ your band director for the fun of it

- finding out your director and your sister plotted against you for no apparent reason

- by putting a fake eyeball in your case

- flinging those flying animals across the room

- and it hits your director

- giving your director a really girly castle that says "Princess Scotty" on it

- when he asks why you didn't put "King Condne" instead, you say it's funnier this way

- and he still has the said castle on display in his office

- telling your director that Bon Jovi's real name is Bojan Jovic (Serbian name)

- when he's majorly obsessed with Bon Jovi

- never dating someone outside of band

- 95 of your friends are band geeks too

- hearing stupid stories from your director about when he was younger

- making fun of your friend and her school band because their uniforms make them look like penguins

- waiter penguins

- memorizing the cadence perfectly

- even though you're not a percussionist

- naming your instrument

- looking like a Popsicle in your red and white marching uniform at homecoming

- knowing so much about your director that you could write a book on his life story

- then telling your geometry teacher

- who gets freaked out

- bragging when you get first chair

- throwing a fit when you don't

- and then getting mad at your director when he won't let you challenge the first chair

- finding a picture of Bon Jovi and pasting your director's head on and calling it "Con Jovi"

- then saying your gonna make t-shirts for the whole band to wear at cedar point with that picture on it

- using your flute or clarinet as a sword and you "fence" with your friends

- having your director play the percussion parts because the percussionist don't have the attention span to do so themselves

- using your director as your celebrity for the celebrity project for English

- and the English sub says yes to the above because you tell her he thinks he's a rock star

- watching Daddy Day Care on free days

- playing poker and bs in the band locker room while watching A Muppets Christmas Carol

- stacking your legs on top of one another while you and your friends are sitting in a circle on free days

- singing random songs obnoxiously loud in different octaves while doing the aforementioned on said free days

- staying after school the day of homecoming, walking to 711, and scarfing down a whole pizza with your friends

- drawing yourself in the center of the focus bubble and drawing the rest of your friends on the other board

- on the other side of the room

- taking Joe's pen drive

- then giving it to Ted

- then getting it back from Ted

- finally giving it to Jeff

- who keeps it for many days

- being a so-called "bread racist"

- and your friends never letting you forget it

- sliding on the band room floor

- even though you know it hasn't been properly cleaned in years

- doing stupid horn movements during the parts you don't play in the marching music because your director told you to

- figuring out the Mission Impossible theme on your flute

- driving everyone bananas with your obnoxious piccolo playing

- even though the judges at festival said on the sheets "nice to hear a well-played piccolo!"

- speaking of bananas, you and your friends make up a song about this guy you know who you all call banana man

- and you sing the song straight to his face

- which he takes as an insult

- you hate your director

- and yet he can be your favorite teacher at the same time (rarely but hey even Condne has his moments)

- your director is completely obsessed w/ Bon Jovi

- tries to look and sing like him

- ah heck he tries to BE Bon Jovi

- he even named his dog Jovi

- you think marching band should be considered a sport because you do more physical work than the football players (MEL: but not XC runners! They're _buff_ x 10)

- you try to get marching band considered a sport

- even though it probably never will be

- and yet you still try

- trying to get through the locked gates to get to the band room to get a very important part of your global issues project

- which is due tomorrow

- first hour

- and you fail to get through said gates

- playing the same stupid song over and over again

- constantly humming you band music

- finding the professional recording on the internet

- and playing along with it to practice

- you know another section's part better than you know your own part

- watching Amanda and Steve fight like crazy daily

- laughing when neither wins

- making a rollcall for you and your friends to the tune of BINGO

- no seriously it's the song BINGO (letters and all)

- two words: BRITSH ACCENTS

- threatening each other with stands

- falling off your chair

- hearing from your director how much your band sucks and that the younger band is better than your guys six times a day

- and he never actually means it

- stealing your director's Pringles

- even when he hides them and tells you not to take any

- he treats your friend like a dog by bribing her with cookies (haha Amanda)

- _AND_ he has a drawer full of Twinkies in his desk

- you consider the band room your home away from home

- or at the very least your favorite room at school

- selling cookie dough for band

- then winning those fuzzy flying frogs (as previously mentioned) and flinging them at you director (WHEEEE!!)

MEL - proving it possible that a person _can_ wear a parachute (aka band shirts)

MEL - getting a sample of the bacteria on the band room floor for science

MEL - having "someone" ask you if you need help carrying a music stand, even though you're perfectly capable, and he knows it, cuz heck, you can do a chin-up! (Mel got mad at Joe cuz she's buff! lol)

MEL - skipping sectionals for XC practice (oops!) hmm, you're probably going to erase this one, aren't you:

MEL – staying for the homecoming game, even though you don't understand football, and have no interest in it whatsoever

AMANDA – never-ending tune time!

AMANDA – listen to director's and Steve's arguments director wins

AMANDA – not knowing who the director is pointing at since he uses his "rock" fingers insert really bad drawingleading to CONFUSION!!

AMANDA – having dumb jokes named after you (Ex- Jill! You just pulled an "Amanda!") grr…

- never knowing who the director's talking to because he says "you" instead of names

- singing and dancing to "Dancing Queen" because your director accidentally put that on the speakers instead of the professional recording of Solara

- both of which are on his iPod

- and then you boo him when he stops the "Dancing Queen" party that _HE_ started

- declaring the little 7th grader who you march next to "your little minion"

- staying after school four days a week for four different band rehearsals for the same concert

- inventing random words at sectionals

- sectionals in general

- having yourself and four of your friends frantically calling the radio station trying to get your director's song on the radio

- each of you on a separate cell phone

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Well? Good? Bad? It's just a bunch of insiders from the DJH Marching/Concert Band. R&R and tell us if we should think of more!

-Mia


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